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Jun
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20
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2009
My Music – My Rebellion
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During my youth group years, the one way I was able to ‘rebel’ was to listen to music that was not Christian. I mean, I always said I like bands like DC Talk, Michael W. Smith, Amy Grant, Steven Curtis Chapman, etc. But really… I like Depeche Mode, Nirvana, The Cure, even some Naughty By Nature. So, when I started driving, I had all kinds of ‘bad’ music and some ‘good’ music, when I had to drive around those who I was trying to impress.
I remember, vividly, rolling up to youth group in my car, with songs like, “Personal Jesus”, “Down with OPP” and “Smells Like Teen Spirit” blasting as loud as possible with the windows down. This was my own form of rebellion, and now seems so silly, but it was important to me at the time. It gave me the ability to put my questionning out there, without it really coming out of my mouth. As hard as I was trying to be the good Christian, I know that, deep down, I was already losing my faith… but I just couldn’t admit it then. It would mean losing the one group of friends I had (I was in no way the popular kid in high school, but at church I had a lot of friends). So, instead of questionning outright at that time, I played my ‘rebelious’ music.
Today, when I hear any of the songs I was listening to back then, it brings a big smile to my face. Because I remember how freeing that music made me feel when it was just me, my car, the wind in my hair and the music. The music that resonated with me more than any Bible verse, more than any sermon, more than any hymn. This music gave me the ability to disconnect from all of that, and just let me really be me.
I wish I had let go then, and not waited another 6 years to start truly being honest with myself and those around me. Would have saved me from much frustration and pain. In college, I remember listening to Tori Amos for hours and hours. I would listen to her lyrics, and hear myself in them. I think, in some strange way, that her music is one of the things that actually gave me the courage to finally stand up and be honest. Because I knew that someone else had done the same… to her minister father, to her church going friends, and to the world at large.
Any songs/music that really means something to you or helped you process your thoughts around religion?
6 responses so far
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June 20, 2009 at 4:38 pm
Church gave me a big outlet for my music. I play guitar, bass, drums and have been inspired to sing and write songs my entire life. I was a main worship leader at my church for eight years.
I always rebelled in my personal music choices. My iPod was a bizarre mix of Jesus and “satan” music. I am most influence by 70’s singer/songwriters and the 90’s grunge movement. I’m somewhere in-between these with a little bit of soulful blues. My next step is to start writing music without the religious theme. It will be weird for me and I’ve been putting it off. My goal is to eventually record an album.
I was always amused by Christian worship music. Only about 10% of it isn’t terrible. I always wondered why Jesus had such aweful taste in music.
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June 20, 2009 at 4:48 pm
“I was always amused by Christian worship music. Only about 10% of it isn’t terrible. I always wondered why Jesus had such awful taste in music.”
I felt the same way, even when I was singing it at every youth group event. When I could, I would purposely get there late so I wouldn’t be there for the worship portion.
BTW, I think that is awesome that you’re planning to write some music and record an album. Hopefully you’ll post it so we can all hear it! I’m sure you have a lot to write about.
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June 20, 2009 at 5:19 pm
“The music that resonated with me more than any Bible verse, more than any sermon, more than any hymn.”
Love this statement. Music…..just music (not religious) has been my church for most of my life! (As my friend puts it, I’m a fu*&ing walking jukebox!) And nature. And smiles. And…
I do not share your experience of having a church to leave. I tried religion as a child but couldn’t buy it. I have private spiritual beliefs that make me smile, but I think it’s ALL good. Well, the planet could do without the slaughter that seems to have persistantly ensued throughout history from all the religious fanatics’ temper tantrums…..that would be a okay.
Sometimes Hendrix inspires me, or the Beatles, or Joni Mitchell, Tom Waits, Prince even has a song!, Bowie, lots of new indie music I don’t even know the name of…tons of music!!!…for me it depends on my mood. There are windows everywhere for me. At the moment, because I like yoga and meditation, I’ve been listening to someone called Ty Burhoe, the album is “Invocation”. It’s from India and I think in Hindi. No idea what they’re saying. It’s mostly very slow, meditative tracks.
Tori Amos is amazing.
Congrats on your courage to follow your heart! I wish you a fantastic journey!!!!!
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Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 111
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 112
Warning: strtotime() [function.strtotime]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 35
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 107
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 109
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 111
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 112
June 20, 2009 at 11:26 pm
Thanks for the nice message… I’m going to go check out Ty Burhoe… sounds interesting!
Warning: strtotime() [function.strtotime]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 35
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 107
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 109
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 111
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 112
Warning: strtotime() [function.strtotime]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 35
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 107
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 109
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 111
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 112
June 25, 2009 at 12:09 am
I still… and always will for all eternity… love Jesus. I also love the Metal music genre. Metallica’s Master of Puppets I know is a song about drugs and addiction but its also a song about Satan and the way he confuses use and destroys your life, just as he has confused all of you. leavingreligion – you are a causality in the war for Truth. For me, as Killswtich Engage states “Even through the darkest days, this fire burns always”. I like finding Christ in the least suspecting of songs. Linkin Park’s What I’ve Done and New Divide are two more obvious ones that have Christian connotations.
Some amazing bands that have helped me in my walk are Stryper, Pillar, Red, and Skillet… it doesn’t get any better when it comes to Christian Metal/Hard Rock.
And when you are an actual Christ follower, only 100% of worship music isn’t terrible.
Warning: strtotime() [function.strtotime]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 35
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 107
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 109
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 111
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 112
Warning: strtotime() [function.strtotime]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 35
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 107
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 109
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 111
Warning: date() [function.date]: It is not safe to rely on the system's timezone settings. You are *required* to use the date.timezone setting or the date_default_timezone_set() function. In case you used any of those methods and you are still getting this warning, you most likely misspelled the timezone identifier. We selected 'America/Denver' for 'MDT/-6.0/DST' instead in /home/diarjor2/public_html/leavingreligion/wp-includes/functions.php on line 112
December 13, 2011 at 3:58 am
I am going to go ahead and bookmark this post for my sister for the research project for school. This is a sweet site by the way. Where did you obtain the design for this website?