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May
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15
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2009
Marriage in America
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I live in a state that has decided to add a constitutional amendment that bans same sex marriages. This same state is, by some, considered one of the more progressive states. This sickens me, especially the way with witch the campaign for the ‘Yes on 8′ was done. A group of people, not even in our state (yes, the Mormon Church) decided that it was worth millions of their dollars to ’save marriage.’
I was a staunch believer that homosexuality was evil, a sin and would send a person straight to hell. I thought that people involved in a gay relationship couldn’t possibly be happy, and just needed more god and prayer. How wrong was I? So wrong that it embarrasses me when I even admit that I thought this way. I was taught to love the sinner, hate the sin. What does this even mean? It means… I hate everything you do, but I love you. Does. not. compute.
Now, I look at dear friends of mine, in gay relationships, who are so in love and have conquered more than a lot of married couples I know. I look at them and wonder why they can’t get married. Why they can’t have the same rights as every other human out there in the U.S. Why they are practically considered a different species by some. It truly saddens me, and I am still upset about how the vote went down in our state. I still hope that someone will see how unconstitutional this amendment is, and will knock some common sense into people by getting rid of it.
My view on homosexuality was one of the first things that changed in me. It changed before I even realized I was starting my de-conversion process. I had dear friends that had come out to me, and I couldn’t reconcile what I thought was true with the person sitting in front of me who was an amazing, caring and loving person. I knew that my viewpoint was wrong, immediately. It didn’t take much soul searching, it was just clear that I was wrong, and I quickly admitted it.
Anyway, back to where I was going… marriage in America needs to be changed to civil unions on the government side, and religious ceremonies on the personal side. Marriage, in the religious sense, never belonged in the government to begin with. Until the religious right can get their divorce/abusive marriages/unhappy marriages down to zero, I think they need to stay out of other people’s decisions about marriage. Period.
One response so far
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September 7, 2009 at 1:46 am
marriage in America needs to be changed to civil unions on the government side, and religious ceremonies on the personal side.
Yes. I have been saying this for years.
The value of it is that there can then be just one law — no nonsense about “marriage” for mixed sex and “civil union” for same sex couples; and hassles trying to keep all the various statutes and regulations about rights and privileges up to date and equal. This will work for those who accept that rights and privileges should reflect realities but who get hung up on words and do not want to call a same sex relationship a marriage.
It will not make any difference for the people who oppose any official recognition of same sex life partnerships.
In the long run, though, it may be moot because there is evidence that fewer and fewer people are opposing this, especially among the younger generations.