Leaving Religion

Something that I knew I would miss about going to church was the social aspect.  I grew up in it, I had friends in it and I really considered it my second home.  Once I left it, I did lose friends.  I would say most of them were lost becuase we didn’t have church in common.  Once that commonality is lost, there doesn’t seem to be a reason to hang out, because of course, there is nothing to talk about if it’s not about church or how God is working in our lives.  I came to accept this… as friends come and go for many reasons.

In all honesty… I’ve never found a group that was as tight as the one I had at the church.  One that pulled you in tightly because of one thing, a belief.  One that held on so tight that they would make you feel that no decision could be made without them right there, praying, listening or questioning.  One that eventually held me so tight, they caused me to flee through the cracks.

I always felt so fake at church.  Like I had to be happy all of the time, accept everyone, and take everyone into my circle.  I never understood why people around me trusted people just because they said they were a Christian.  I could never do that… I tried… thought that if I faked it enough I’d like everyone and want everyone to be my friend.  But, I never got that feeling, no matter how much I prayed for it to happen.

Yes, my social life is much different now, but I would argue that it is much more real now.  I hang out with people because I truly like them, not because of some belief.  I do things with people I really truly enjoy being with.  It’s different, but it’s good!

Tags: socializing after church